Home and Away: Ryder has to sack his girlfriend Chloe

Ooh, tough gig. Mac tells Ryder to sack his GF.

But Mac’s savage remark - which hits home for anyone whose had a casual job in hospitality or retail - is justification enough for me.

We’re just minutes in when I come up against my first grievance of the night: Mac is wearing jeans.

Now don’t get me wrong, I have no qualms with jeans, but Mac’s depressed and recovering from not one but two stints in hospital so why isn’t she wearing elasticated pants?

Here I am rushing home every night so I have the maximum amount time in my jarmies.

Ziggy is on Mac babysitting duties while she mopes around the house, and understandably so given her boyfriend, Ari, left her for an old fling, they’re already living together and Mac was pregnant with his child, was keeping it a secret from him until half the town found out because they just so happened to be in the hospital at the same time.

“I can’t stop thinking about why Ari is allowed to be happy with Mia and I’m here alone,” Mac says.

And with that, she’s suddenly back to her normal self. Classic Home and Away not to dwell on mental health.

Anyway, Ryder has been holding the fort at Salt in Mac’s absence.

Chloe and Ryder’s love for one another is sickening.

The evening is basically a montage of them making out in various locations. In front of Grumps, next to the pickles in the cool room, in the doorway of the Parata’s house.

They break for air briefly when Mac summons Ryder and promotes him to 2IC.

However, his first duty is firing his girlfriend, Chloe.

“I want here gone ASAP,” Mac says.

“I just don’t feel comfortable firing anyone without a good reason,” Ryder replies.

Chloe lives with the Parata’s and it’s a bit awkward seeing her plus Mac also doesn’t know that Ruder and Chloe are an item.

“It’s not up for debate, either follow my instructions for I’ll find a 2IC that can,” Mac says.

Ryder asks Grumps for advice.

“Well, your boss can’t fire you…but whatever you decide you’re going to have to accept the consequences,” Alf says.

Ryder doesn’t go through with it, but he tells Mac that he did fire her.

Mac stops in at work and Ryder confesses that “if you go upstairs you will see that I haven’t fired Chloe.”

So Mac delivers the “quick and painless” blow.

Cue the fallout.

Alf and Dean say their bit and then Mia confronts Mac.

“I know you have a problem with me but you do not take it out on my daughter,” Mia says.

She slips in “your sister is a nightmare” as she passes Dean on the way out because the insults must be PG even if the themes aren’t.

Ryder is having a hard time coming to terms with it all and approaches Mac and brings up “unfair dismissal”.

“Oh please Ryder you know she’s a casual,” Mac responds which is the best line of the entire night and something anyone who’s had a casual job in hospitality or retail would relate to.

But here’s a bit of advice Mac. Instead of firing them, never roster them on again and the unwanted employee will be forced to leave and get a new job.

Then there’s Amber dropping the “L” bomb, Dean ignoring it, fighting and getting back together which is an hour of my life I’ll never get back.

He’s going on about how happy he is and “I have it all” so Amber says “I love you.”

Dean just stares into oblivion…which is okay. He was caught off guard and they’ve been together for all of a few days but Amber turns it into this massive issue, complete with tears – well puffy red eyes suggesting she’s crying - because her character has no purpose if she’s content.

But she settles after a cup of tea, literally tea because we’re back in 50’s watching Call The Midwife, and her and Dean’s relationship is back to normal.

Then Justin, whose stupidity continues to dumbfound me.

He’s been frequently popping pills, so they supply has run out.

His specialist doesn’t have an appointment for a week so he calls another medical centre and deigns to ask if he needs an appointment to get a prescription. Does this man live under a rock?

The producers make a point of showing us he stores his newly acquired medication on top of the fridge, like this is something that will become very significant in the future.

Justin signs up for the surf comp, which is full speed ahead under the capable hands of Roo and Dean because he has to constantly prove to his son that he’s dad of the year.

Then Justin is suddenly struck with a bout of pain and knocks back an entire packet of pills. Surely he’ll overdose which means he’s ruined his chances of taking part in the surf comp.

Meanwhile Leah is still taking it upon herself to investigate Susie because the police are non-existent. We all know where this is going – Leah’s going to become obsessed with bringing Susie down for conning them out of $90,000, but until she reaches peak Jasmine levels of insanity, I can’t be bothered talking about it.

Although surprisingly, Justin says something of note and mentions to Leah that it might be “healthier if you let it go” which is a bit rich coming from a man that was refusing medical treatment and is now gobbling up pain meds.