Editor’s Desk: The scary unknown leading up to my very first surgery, ever

How many times have you gone under the knife? Can you add up your surgeries on one hand, or are you all too familiar with the inside of an operating theatre over the years that you’ve lost count? For me, the answer is simple: None. Well, all that is about to change next month. I’m in my early 40s, and I am about to undergo my first operation. Which will end my membership of what is likely a very small club. I’ve never been put under general anaesthetic for anything and I am approaching my elective surgery date with increasing trepidation. As someone who firmly feels the need to be in control at all times, the idea of willingly being knocked out freaks me out. Call me a wuss, but it’s the unknown that is preying on my nerves. The feeling of drifting off into neverland as I count down from 10 (at least that’s how they do it in the movies and on TV), how loopy I will feel coming out of the fog, what kind of crazy stuff I will say, the absolute fear that I will somehow wake up half-way surgery (OK, I admit this one is a very remote possibility). In many ways, I am lucky I have gone this long without needing surgery. Other people have had more than my fair share, including my father who has been on an operating table about 30 times in his lifetime. So, I’m well aware I have no reason to be complaining, but I wish I knew what to expect leading into this. Hell, I’ve been to the emergency department a few times, but I’ve never been admitted into hospital in my life. I’m also wondering about post-surgery. I’ve heard various stories about people coming out of their anaesthetic stupor. Most of it funny, some of it downright embarrassing. Also, I know that I am not the best when it comes to pain and being sick, so I am not looking forward to the recovery process. Two weeks I’m told, by my surgeon. I don’t know what kind of patient I will be, but I’m about to find out. On the bright side, I’ve had ongoing sleep issues lately so being put out of it for a few hours of uninterrupted shut-eye might be a blessing in disguise. People have told me that going under is the best sleep you can get. And even if I do wake up in excruciating pain, all I will have to do is press a button for some pain relief. After putting off this elective surgery for arguably too long, it’s about time I face my fear, let go and give up control.